pfingstrossen

ok, so this is completely random, but considering this is a blog, everything i say is essentially random, right? at least since i don't really post on a regular basis.

i'm not much of a gardener, i'm afraid (i have a small habit of accidentally killing any plant alive), but i wish i were, just so i could have this flower. (in german, it's called Pfingstrossen, but i don't know the name of this specific one. i believe it's some kind of peony, but, like i said, i don't know the variety. i just know that, 1. it's found in switzerland, and 2. i know nothing about plants, nor do i really care so much. i just know this one) i first discovered it when my 2nd companion and i were on our way to an appointment in my first area, Frauenfeld. i had to stop because they were so pretty and i had never seen a flower quite like them before, in all honesty. i believe they're fairly common in europe, but not so much here? hm. not entirely sure. i'm sure google would be kind enough to help out in that discovery, though.

perhaps this seems silly, but i love how delicate and feminine these flowers are. i dubbed these last summer as being my favorite flower and they still are.

i'm the kind of person where i may not know what i like/want at first, but once i find it, it's a solidified decision. however, that also means that i can be rather specific about what i do and do not like. with these flowers, i like that specific one above. not any other variety or color. that specific one. here's what it looks like when it opens up more:

beautiful, yes?

and that's the end of the botany post. probably forever.

in other wonderful news:

The Kansas City Temple is nearing completion! Ok, there's still the entire inside to do, along with the grounds, etc...but just look at the temple! It's GORGEOUS!

give me music or give me death

I've discovered a couple of seriously awesome bands in the past couple of weeks, thanks to NPR's Tiny Desk Concerts and I highly recommend them. I'll include the links to the TDC, so you can download it and enjoy it for many years to come. I had already listened to and enjoyed music by Iron and Wine, so you'll recognize his voice, but I especially love the song "Maryanne" that he includes in the session. It makes me nostalgic for things of recent past. Great song. Good memories...things I definitely miss.

Short post for those with short attention spans. Plus, I don't really have much to say. Enjoy the music, my friends!

Ghost of a Saber Tooth Tiger: http://www.npr.org/2010/12/08/131291469/the-ghost-of-a-saber-tooth-tiger-tiny-desk-concert

Iron and Wine: http://www.npr.org/2011/01/22/133059550/iron-and-wine-tiny-desk-concert **head's up, he's loose with language in a song, so if you have sensitive ears, beware. It's a fabulous session though.

Ivan and Alyosha: http://www.npr.org/2011/02/07/133463326/ivan-and-alyosha-tiny-desk-concert

freshly baked bread and other delectable edible products

sure, i'll admit it: i don't eat american bread anymore. i do enjoy the occasional white bread, but i can't really eat the store bought kind. i need the european stuff. i'm addicted. so yes, i bake myself wonderful rustic european breads each week. today, it's the French Country loaf; ah, there's nothing quite like fresh bread out of the oven.

this morning, my sister informed me of an atrocity, something that truly shook heaven and earth: someone told her that no one can tell the difference between a mix or from scratch. meine gute...how can anyone say such blasphemous words? OF COURSE you can tell the difference between the two--it's beyond obvious! yes, there is a place for mixes and they can come in quite useful at times, but i truly enjoy creating something people enjoy. i love to bake! i have a knack for it. and a passion, might i add. i love coming up with recipes and sharing these said baked delights with those around me. carrot cake (i make a pretty wicked carrot cake), chocolate pb cheesecake, cheesecake brownies, my chocolate cookies with my very delectable (and very secret) frosting...my, oh my...how i love to bake! i would love to open up a bakery someday. a very quaint bakery, similar to the one maggie gyllenhaal has in "Stranger Than Fiction." so delightful.

in other news: the King's Speech=AMAZING and i am the proud owner of all the Beethoven dvds featuring the Vienna Philharmonic, under the direction of Christian Thielemann. I've been waiting for these DVDs for 2 years! AH! i was there, my friends. i was there when they started filming the concerts. and it was amazing. ah, wien...

i couldn't resist, i had to redesign my blog. i needed something that was more me and not something some company had thrown together to be "cool." part of my lack of resistance is due to my procrastination/break from studying. mid-terms, my friends, mid-terms...

once more, i can say that my life is quite interesting--there never seems to be a dull moment! it's a bit of a roller coaster right now, but tis all good; all of our lives are like that, right? it's funny, i've been thinking about how when i was younger and would always complain about how boring my life was. had i only known what my life would be like now, i wouldn't have expressed such a sentiment.

it appears that this summer will be a bit slower now for me. i can't lie, i'm somewhat grateful for it. a few weeks ago, whilst undergoing testing (remember how i mentioned that my freak back problem was back? yeah, the testing and that are related), i was listening to some music and a familiar song rang out through the headphones:

Slow down, you crazy child
you're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart, tell me
Why are you still so afraid?

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You'd better cool it off before you burn it out
You've got so much to do and
Only so many hours in a day

But you know that when the truth is told..
That you can get what you want or you get old
You're gonna kick off before you even
Get halfway through
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

Slow down, you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight
Tonight,...
Too bad but it's the life you lead
you're so ahead of yourself that you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong, you know
You can't always see when you're right. you're right

You've got your passion, you've got your pride
but don't you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

Slow down, you crazy child
and take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile
it's all right, you can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize,..Vienna waits for you?
And you know that when the truth is told
that you can get what you want or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get half through
Why don't you realize,. Vienna waits for you
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

i realized that i'm just trying to do way too much and i was pushing myself so hard that i was already missing out on some great things. so i'll have to wait an extra semester/year to start grad school. that's okay, i'll have extra time to work, travel (i'm hoping to go back to Austria and Switzerland) and so it's totally fine if i have to take a little longer. it's certainly unexpected, yes, with how long it's taking to finish my undergrad, but if i look back on everything i've done and experienced during the years just following high school, i have no regrets, so why let it get to me? i honestly cannot express all of the thoughts that went through my mind and the emotions i felt when this song came on, but believe me, i needed to hear those words that very moment. "slow down, you're doing fine..." just slow down a bit and enjoy the ride, my friends. don't let yourself miss out on some of the greatest things you could experience.

Grüezi!

Well, my friends, it has been quite some time since the last post. Life has certainly had its ups and downs since the last post. I assure you, however, that the ups greatly outweigh the downs. I made the decision to return to school whilst completing my physical therapy. Unfortunately, it seems that the odd back problem has returned with somewhat of a vengeance. Let's just say that it's making life interesting.

Onto much more positive things...

I decided to keep my mission blog attached to this so you all can read some past experiences (should you so desire). And honestly, I just didn't want to delete the entries. Laziness? Nostalgia? You can choose between the two.

School is keeping me super busy. I'm far busier than I remember being before the mission; however, now I'm much more focused, so perhaps that's why. Sometimes I feel like the mission was just a dream, it passed by so quickly.

I wish I were better expressing myself through words. I find myself unable to say what I want to say at the moment or unable to put into words my thoughts. Fortunately, I can easily find that necessary outlet through music, more specifically, my cello. I love music! I'm happy to be back in the middle of it all. How I missed it! I hope you all have that passion in your life. It's so important to do what you love. If you know me at all, you know how passionate I am about that. Do what you love, my friends! Be happy!

Come What May and Love It

Well, I'm sure you all are quite curious as to what has happened to me. Honestly, I'm curious as well. I have no idea how it's happened, but I'll tell you everything that I know, so as to answer your unasked questions.

About 6 weeks ago, while still in Frauenfeld, I started having this weird pain in my hip. Odd. But I didn't really think much of it; I figured I had probably just slept in a funny position or something. Once I was transferred to Richterswil, the pain got worse and I suddenly had pain shooting down my left leg. I felt it a great deal in my calf, and as I went throughout the transfer, the pain rapidly grew worse and spread throughout my entire leg, over to my right leg and continued spreading up my back. It became so bad I couldn't even walk. It was frustrating because we couldn't even go out and work, the pain was so bad. Taking stairs or walking up and down hill, and honestly, just even walking, was incredibly painful. Pain medications weren't working and I was speaking with the area doctor and doctors in my area for weeks trying to figure all of this out.

Last week, I met with other doctors and they, after doing a couple of physical examinations, determined that the reason I had so much pain was due to a herniated disc. Another doctor thought it was possibly something to do with my Sciatic Nerve. All I knew was that I was in horrible pain and prayed I could get all of this resolved so that we could go out and work.

As I spoke with President Condie, he asked a couple of questions and said he would call me back later. I was hoping to work in the mission office for the rest of the transfer and the next one so I could heal. Unfortunately, when President Condie called me, the first thing he said to me was, "Sister NeSmith, are you sitting down?" My goodness, those are the worst words to start out any conversation with! He told me that, after praying about it, both he and Sister Condie feel it best to that I be sent home. He said that there's clearly something serious wrong and so he said they would try to take me to the mission office to work there and then send me home at the end of the transfer. 2 days later, President Condie called to tell me I would go to Munich on Monday the 6th and fly home on the 7th.

The past week has been extremely emotional for me. I don't know what Heavenly Father has planned for me. At this point, I'm just going with it. He has a plan for each and every one of us and so I figure I'll just follow his plan instead of trying to make up my own. President Condie said that after I've been treated, I need to allow at least a month after I've healed to make sure I don't have any pain whatsoever, should I try to go back out. I don't really know if I will. I would love to, naturally, but I don't know what Heavenly Father has planned for me. When the time comes, I'll make that decision very prayerfully.

It's such a blessing to know that Heavenly Father has a plan for each and every one of His children. Doesn't that provide so much comfort? Believe me, it has been a huge blessing of comfort for me throughout this whole process.

So, now I'm back home. I'm being released tonight by my stake president. And we'll just see what happens from there.

I'm sad to have left. I didn't want to, but I trust President Condie and I know that he wouldn't have sent me home unless it was the right thing to do. So here I am in Kansas, back much sooner than expected. But just as Elder Wirthlin said in his wonderful talk, "Come What May and Love It." That's my motto and that's what I'm going to do.

Guten Morgen!

There is much to tell you, but unfortunately, I don't have as much time as I would like. The life of a missionary, right?

Last week, Sister Watkins and I traveled to Munich (I love Munich!!) for a training session. It was great because we got to meet the sisters in the other parts of the mission and I was able to see friends I haven't talked to in such a long time. It was wonderful and we learned so much! It was so great to be able to be in Munich, learning how to help others better and see how the mission is changing. I mentioned a couple of times what we learned at last Zone Conference and how a lot of responsibility is moving from the mission president to the missionaries and it focuses a lot on how to better teach those seeking the gospel. As missionaries, we're teaching investigators how to receive revelation for themselves and how they can better come to know that our Savior loves them, specifically. It's all very exciting and I'm grateful for this chance to better help the people here.

I wish I could have posted pictures, but alas, I was unable to find my camera. Fear not, it is in the apartment...I just don't remember where...So...pictures of Munich will be attached next week.

It's been an interesting couple of weeks here in Richterswil. People have moved, investigators have dropped us...it's been a bit sad, but there are those that are out there seeking the Gospel and we get to bring it to them, so we can't get discouraged because then we'll fail to see those searching for the gospel.

For now, I bid you adieu. Until next week, my people!

Love,

Sister NeSmith