nesmith

i couldn't resist, i had to redesign my blog. i needed something that was more me and not something some company had thrown together to be "cool." part of my lack of resistance is due to my procrastination/break from studying. mid-terms, my friends, mid-terms...

once more, i can say that my life is quite interesting--there never seems to be a dull moment! it's a bit of a roller coaster right now, but tis all good; all of our lives are like that, right? it's funny, i've been thinking about how when i was younger and would always complain about how boring my life was. had i only known what my life would be like now, i wouldn't have expressed such a sentiment.

it appears that this summer will be a bit slower now for me. i can't lie, i'm somewhat grateful for it. a few weeks ago, whilst undergoing testing (remember how i mentioned that my freak back problem was back? yeah, the testing and that are related), i was listening to some music and a familiar song rang out through the headphones:

Slow down, you crazy child
you're so ambitious for a juvenile
But then if you're so smart, tell me
Why are you still so afraid?

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?
You'd better cool it off before you burn it out
You've got so much to do and
Only so many hours in a day

But you know that when the truth is told..
That you can get what you want or you get old
You're gonna kick off before you even
Get halfway through
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

Slow down, you're doing fine
You can't be everything you want to be
Before your time
Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight
Tonight,...
Too bad but it's the life you lead
you're so ahead of yourself that you forgot what you need
Though you can see when you're wrong, you know
You can't always see when you're right. you're right

You've got your passion, you've got your pride
but don't you know that only fools are satisfied?
Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

Slow down, you crazy child
and take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile
it's all right, you can afford to lose a day or two
When will you realize,..Vienna waits for you?
And you know that when the truth is told
that you can get what you want or you can just get old
You're gonna kick off before you even get half through
Why don't you realize,. Vienna waits for you
When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

i realized that i'm just trying to do way too much and i was pushing myself so hard that i was already missing out on some great things. so i'll have to wait an extra semester/year to start grad school. that's okay, i'll have extra time to work, travel (i'm hoping to go back to Austria and Switzerland) and so it's totally fine if i have to take a little longer. it's certainly unexpected, yes, with how long it's taking to finish my undergrad, but if i look back on everything i've done and experienced during the years just following high school, i have no regrets, so why let it get to me? i honestly cannot express all of the thoughts that went through my mind and the emotions i felt when this song came on, but believe me, i needed to hear those words that very moment. "slow down, you're doing fine..." just slow down a bit and enjoy the ride, my friends. don't let yourself miss out on some of the greatest things you could experience.